It never looks like. You think that she is doing her thing, as she does. Then one day she is not around, since she took time off. A burnout, they tell you. You might even wonder: how was it that you did not see it? Well, you were not paying attention to her, were you now?
And yet they tell us that ladies do know how to express their emotions. But what about him? In your humble opinion, the least likely candidate for a midlife crisis. So it happens that one day you are drinking a beer and he says, as if talking to his shoulder, yep, past year almost took me down. Barely survived the depression. You look, and wonder if he is pulling your leg. You make a bad joke to relax an atmosphere that is not even tense. Your friend let it pass. You actually have no idea what to say.
You actually believe that you are safely away, past, that time. The time that you looked at the mirror and asked, is this it? is this really it? Some get lucky, and when asking those things, some sober inner voice spoke back and tells that it doesn’t really matter if this is it, or isn’t. Still have to work to pay an hypotheque, a car, the next holiday. You will figure out if this it or isn’t some other day. If you get lucky that day, when you get some time to think about yourself, is not about to come anytime soon.
But are you the lucky one, now?
A change of jobs. A new hobby. Around the world trip. A divorce, an affair. Ideally, that is. More likely, the wish of a different job, the hope for the extra time that a new hobby will take, the money that you haven’t got for the really long plane ticket. And let’s not even start about the drainage of a new love, or god forbids, the recognition that you actually don’t love her anymore, that he long ago stop seeing you.
Crisis? what crisis? the one that is going to take you down? or the one that will get you in that direction that you were meant to be? How can you know... how can you know... before hand.
How can you know? Hear the voice now, ask your friend, sit your wife and ask for her help. Or not. Just go to the office, don’t stop the cash flow, man up, as they say. Don’t be a snowflake. Why would you be entitled to a better job, a better life? Why would you? Do you really think that you are different?